FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK ! I'm so hating my life right now. I just keep on feeling that there's just something missing. It's just ain't right.. Haaaishh. ): I swear to god, L.O.V.E had turned my life upside down. I've been missing you too much with all those memories & things we've been thru together that it is killing me slowly. I've gave up on you, and what we call LOVE. I don't wanna give a damn about all this, it sucks i swear. Its really heartbreaking knowing that all this has to end this way. Even know, i can't figure out what's wrng with me, what i really want now? What i want from you, what am i expecting? I just dont know, cause im really confuse with the situation i am in now. I just hope the best for me. I just wish things were fine! )': Its been hard, knowing we still love each other that much, but we're just not making it right again. Even now things gets worst as time goes, and ya'knw what? I cant stand it any longer. I just want all this to end, i wanna be happy like i used to, its just that now it will be without you, NO MORE YOU! Ya'knw, i swear i wanna get rid of you, but im not strong to face all this, im not able to, i guess? Haisssssssssh. I dont want to be stuck with you, cause its no use... I know things won't get better, i know you will be just fine without me in your life and most important of all, i know you can move on and have a fresh start. But i dont know if i can. When will i get rid of you, will it even take years? I wonder? Haisshhhh. The point that i cant take it any longer, i've really given up on you. I no longer wished you were mine again. Cause i'm really not the best for you, you can get someone way much better than me. Hmmmm. ): I could still rmber all those pain you've put me thru, and i've forgiven you. I hoped for all the things i've done and said, For all the hurt that i've caused you, i just hope you will forgive me, cause that wasn't what i meant to do. You know that i cant bare to hurt you, as what hurts you hurts me way much more! Im hurt with all those blames you're putting me, when you just dont realise all the pain im going thru with this left over pieces you left me. It hurts when you just don't seem to care and when you're not putting yourself in my position. You're being really unfair towards this.. Haishh. ): I can be the most nicest person to you, if ONLY you were able to make yourself understand me much better. Hmmm. I dont wanna quarrel with you over things anymore, and now i frequently give in with you, like you said, im no longer yours. YEAH, IM NO LONGER YOURS! SO NOW HECK CARE. Haaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiisssssssssssshhhhhhh. Are you even guilty for putting me thru all this? Dearest boy, i've just had enough. I did tried to understand the pain you're going thru, dont say tht i didnt understand you, well, I DID AND I TRIED.. But it needs two hands to clap, you're not trying to make yourself understand me AT ALL. Im over this dearest boy, i wanna be myself, my old self, leading my single life and giving my fuullest for my studies. I just want you to know, what im going thru is really tough, it really is. But i really thank you for all those sweet memories we used to have, thanks for making who i am today, and thnks for making me a stronger girl to be able to face all challenges that comes along the way. Everything has changed me. I dont need anyone to held on, i know i'll get over you. No more tears, no more being sad. I'll make it okay again, i will change this FUCKING life of mine. I just want the best for you, im sorry im not the best, at least ive tried to be. I'm leaving it all to fate for what will happen about us. Now, heck care. Its been too much of you on my mind, and NOW, i will think of myself. <3