^ That's me dearest boyfriend, i love him sooo much. This few months have been tough for us, we had a lot of arguments, misunderstandings, fights & quarrels. It has been difficult for us, even till now. Too much that has been going on. 9 mnths with him, and its hard to accept the fact that i have to let him go. I never thought that it will be rather difficult to loose you than having you for the first time. I've been spending my nights crying, knowing that i hurt you or when i have to accept the fact that we were no longer together. It hurts so deep that even my tears cant even explain itself. 9 mnths being with you, everything i do just reminds me of you and how can i expect myself to move on & knowing that you're no longer mine. How i wished mistakes were never done between us, and we dont have to fight & break-up over the same things again. Its sad knowing that we cant be the best for each other, and its sad for me that everytime i wanna make things better, you would make it worst again, And everytime we are back together, you will make us apart again. ts really heartbreaking dearest boy. ): I may say that relationship dont last, cause being with you, i feel that r/s are actually meant forever. Cause loosing you was my biggest mistake. How i wished i was perfect. Sometimes, the hurt you caused me are just scars on my heart, cause i dont mind crying for you or letting my heart break as long as i sleep every night having a smile on my face, knowing that you were still mine. But what can i do, i dont have control over all this, all i could do was to pray that each day will be better for us. Frankly, im not ready at all to let you go, to accept that you are no longer mine.. But i know , if one day we are going to be apart, i have to let you go.
-IF I end up being the one walking away. I want you to know that it wasn’t because I stopped loving you but because you hurt me too deep with all those promises & mistakes you repeated
If only i could explain in any better ways that i really love you i would have. But if you really loved me, you shld not have make this a question cause you know i do love you. I dont mind if you're different cause you used to think you cant change for me, i dont mind letting myself accept the fact the way you are. I cant bear to loose you. I really cant. )":
Dearest , tell me that this is a dream & hug me all you can. Than you shed your tear, and whisper into my ear saying, "I'm sorry, but the best is to be apart." Than you walk away forever. And i started crying, and shouted "I will wait for you."
Muhd Fauzy Abdul Rahman, forever i will love you. ):